We Asked. You Answered. Midlife, Unfiltered.
What you said about love, bodies, sex, and the curveballs of life after 40 - raw, loud, and real!
We’re done with fake compliments. We’re rewriting the rules on love, laughing at body curveballs, surviving the plot twists… and still curious about the bedroom (even if the decorative pillows get more action some nights)!
Turns out, when you ask midlife women about relationships, sex, bodies, and the nonsense people say to us, the answers come with zero filters and a lot of wisdom. Here’s what our first seven Ask a Real Girl polls revealed - and why I know we’re finally done pretending!
When it comes to hot flashes, survival hacks are the real MVP
Our most recent poll asked: “What’s your go-to survival move for hot flashes?”
The winner: Fans in every damn room (35%).
Close behind: Strip layers like it’s a Vegas show (29%).
Runners-up: Ice packs in the bra (18%) + Pretend it’s a tropical vacation (18%).
Your DMs? Pure midlife ingenuity… and let’s be honest, some of us are clearly doing more than one at once (okay, it’s me).
Love Before Midlife: The Things We Wish We’d Known
The winner? Your happiness is non-negotiable. 67% percent of you called this the ultimate love lesson. Chemistry is fun (20%), and sure, some of you have stopped looking to see who shows up (13%).
But the idea that love could fix anyone? Zero. Percent. Love isn’t a repair tool. We’re done being somebody’s renovation project… and we’re over trying to turn anyone else into ours.
Fake Compliments We’re Setting on Fire
Top offenders:
“Bold outfit choice at your age” (36%).
“You’re lucky you don’t care anymore” (32%).
“You’ve really embraced aging” (27%).
And we’re adding a new one from the DMs: “You’re lucky.” Because no, it’s not luck; it’s decades of work, therapy, tears, reinvention, and refusing to shrink!
Our Bodies, Our Biggest WTF Moments
Two things tied for first: I sweat in places I didn’t used to and I’m obsessed with my midlife self (29% each).
Right behind them: Jeans that fit at 8am but betray me by noon and Hormones are holding me hostage (21% each).
And the emails + DMs? Flooded with even more midlife gems: nose growth, rogue gray nose hairs, chin whiskers, disappearing eyebrows (yes, clearly there’s a hair theme), sore nipples, and belly bloat that rolls in like a damn storm front.
Bedroom Vibes: The Midlife Edition
Top vibe? I want it more than they do (42%). And the close second: What’s sex? Is that still a thing? (33%).
And someone said what we were all thinking: I thought you were speaking about decorative pillows and cooling sheets.
Plot Twists Galore
By a landslide, Parenting adults took 67% of the votes.
Dating after 50, questioning your choices, and career pivots split the rest evenly.
Turns out, midlife plot twists don’t come with a warning label!
What We Wish We Knew in Our 30s or 40s
This poll was a gut punch of truth:
Love ≠ self-abandonment (36%)
You’re allowed to change your mind (36%)
Perfection is a scam (14%)
Money = choices; use them well (14%)
If we could go back, that’s the wisdom we’d slip into our younger selves’ back pockets: Permission. Boundaries. Truth. Getting older isn’t about “knowing better.” It’s about finally refusing the bullshit.
And Your Comments and Shares? Pure. Gold.
From big-girl-panty confessions (“Fruit of the Loom bikini briefs - they breathe!”) to career restarts, to someone raising teens while hitting hormone chaos herself… it’s the kind of honesty you won’t get anywhere else: blunt, bold, and hilarious.
Your Midlife, Your Rules: Welcome to the Real Girls Guide to Over 55
Because this is where we stop apologizing, start talking about what really matters, and finally have the conversations no one else is having - together.
I started The Real Girls Guide to Over 55 because too many of us were navigating midlife alone - with no real talk about what it all actually feels like.
The blogs and the book? They’re here so we can laugh, rage, cry, and reclaim - out loud, together.
Subscribe if you haven’t yet (it’s free). Read the posts. Share your story. This isn’t just my space and my book in the making - it’s our conversation, our space, and our book. And you belong here.
#RGG55, #RealGirlsGuide, #Askarealgirlpoll #MidlifeUnfiltered, #HotFlashHacks, #LoveAfter50, #YourMidlifeYourRules
We’ve earned every wrinkle. Might as well make more laugh lines together.
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